the lousiness of the long-distance movie

Knackered Downunder loses the will to watch

The boredom of long-haul flying is doing wonders highlighting the unimaginativeness and mediocrity of much of modern-day Hollywood, as well as reinforcing the old adage “100 channels and nothing to watch”.

On a recent flight from Sydney to Tokyo — almost 10 hours — it occurred to me that there is also a certain irony in the situation; ever-growing lists of in-flight movie selections which are meant to relieve the tedium and provide greater choice ironically achieve the opposite.

Ocean’s Thirteen feels remarkably like Ocean’s Twelve, which in turn reminds you of Ocean’s Eleven. Meanwhile, Pirates of the Carribbean 3 is definitely worse than Pirates 2, which is a disappointing outgrowth of the outstanding Pirates 1. Performances by Johnny Depp and Keira Knightly couldn’t do much to salvage Pirates 3 (At World’s End), which is convoluted and way too long, much like the flight.

Rather than keep you entertained, movie selections of such quality only engender more boredom and then frustration as you channel-surf, desperately hoping for something watchable as you realize you still have five long hours to go.

In-flight movie selections are, as indicated, getting wider. But unfortunately it’s a case of more of the same. And while there are attempts to throw in “classics”, it’s usually more a case of anything pre-2000. In the end, the standard is predictable and “lite”, much like the menus offered.

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Tags: creativity, endurance, long-haul-flight, mood, movies, what hacks off the hack?, what knackered the hack?